Friday, January 23, 2009

So there's a few things rattling around in my head today but I'm on a plane so my research abilities are severely limited. With that in mind I'll take a break from railing against injustice and address the issue of how I got to be here. I mean "here" as in this space online, not "here" like in the universe.

I think that, though I am not unique, I am an unlikely Christian. Though I do have Catholic roots with the Puerto Rican side of my family and was baptized in the Catholic church as a baby I grew up in Berkeley with my non-religious Japanese American mother. Mom didn't have much use for organized religion choosing instead to follow a sort of hybrid Buhddism/Santeria form of spirituality. She always said she believed in something but she was content to leave it somewhat undefined. If my mother had cared anything for baseball she may have become a sort of Annie Savoi. This influence, coupled with growing up in Berkeley and basically not ever remembering knowing anyone who's family espoused any specific religious belief, I was also content to create my spirituality as I went along.

And so for a long time, like Annie Savoi, I believed in baseball. I believed in the spiritual freedom that comes from kick-flipping the four stair at the post office. I believed in grunge rock and true love and that you could have both. I did not believe in Jesus Christ. At least not as a savior. I believed in Jesus as a historical figure. I believed he was someone who gave a great many people a great amount of hope. I believed that he believed he was dying for our sins and so he may as well have been. After all if I say I'm taking a job I don't like because I want good things for my family and my family believes it then the sacrifice is good. Right? I basically figured this was how I would live my life forever.

So what changed? Throughout my life there were little things. Conversations with family members, debating the merits of the church with friends and classmates, that sort of thing. The turning point began when I got to graduate school. My first semester I was paired up working as a research assistant with another first year student in my department. She's a spritely Christian girl from Alabama and aside from our general friendliness, decision to enter the same profession, and willingness to work a low paying research job we had nothing in common. We also had a lot of time to talk. During that year she showed me that someone could be a practicing Christian and still be normal. One quote of hers has stuck with me, “I’m all about God and very little about religion.” This coming from a church going gal was a revelation.

Over the next few years I met quite a few people who would continue to show me that practicing Christians could be fun people. Most of all they showed me that people who have faith aren’t all out to convert you or look down on you if you don’t share their beliefs. If anything it’s just the opposite. People who are truly secure in their faith don’t feel a need to change others. Instead they are willing to engage in actual dialogue when people approach them. Meeting dedicated but non-dogmatic Christians helped me begin to re-frame my views on organized religion.

That's the story for today. Next time: Berto's final steps towards becoming an affirmed Christian, or "Meeting My Wife."